Followup to the first critique on the Lindeman, this one deals more with the speed at which you play it. Tim played it rather quickly in the first recording he sent in. (This recording was done over a phone message)
1. Slowing down a lot, factor of 2 or 3.
2. Work on making movements with fingers that are smooth and even.
These are very similar to my previous recommendations, but the need for reducing the speed was even more clear in this case.